Scarring the fragile heart

Have you ever wondered why some of your friends seem to know a lot about people they found seemingly attractive on the net, and why they talk about these people all day?

Makes me wonder: You my friend, have a vast ocean of knowledge on this person's background though the person doesn't even know you exist. And yet I'm your best friend and you know me no more than a speck of dust.

Sometimes you can't help wondering what they REALLY think of you. Take me for instance, I've experienced countless betrayals and met a whole zoo of traitors. Hmm... must be some kinda of record.. or just a curse that is chained on me for life..

Here are some stories:

There was Girl A, whom she meant the world to me. But at one point she had enough of me and left a scar in my heart, far too painful to bear. Fortunately, this was a friendship which was made to last, and it did. The situation between her and I now is different, but the wound remains, in a memory that wouldn’t fade away.

Then there’s Boy B, whom at that time, I considered him a friend so amazing, it certainly changed my life. Being with him meant security and trust. But this friendship was a mere fluke in the end, I was backstabbed, at the point of time when I thought my ‘friend’ was the person I could approach after a lonely period which only added insult to injury.

Boy C, was a friendly acquaintance for 2 years. I treated him just as a friend, whom he had no problems cooperating and doing projects with, not to mention laugh at the same jokes. But Boy C soon found a reason to believe that Hyder is a sort of ..jynx? He just turned his back, for an immature reason that had involved Boy B as well. B & C weren’t true friends. Immature minds think alike.

There was Girl D and her gang, who used humiliation and revealed a dark secret that changed my life forever. The horrible things they do on the internet. The horrible things they did to me.

There was Boy E, whom came to school as a new student and Hyder was his best company. As they parted, Boy E moved to back to Indonesia and then to Australia, where he met Hyder again online, but this time, a whole new person: “ I don’t know you, freak.”

There were many others who were meant to be unspoken, but can never be forgotten.
All of them had taken the dagger of betrayal, and each carved their own initials into this meek, fragile heart. Why? Why did all this happen to me in such a short period of time? It's like still being alive after being struck by lightning 7 times, and yet you still fly kites in the storm.

Thankfully things are starting to look up, Metamorphosis will cleanse off all this evil memories.
I'm really happy with my friends now, and I'm enjoying my new class. But my fear just won't go away. I know, I will face more situations like these for the rest of my life..

This is the real reason why I value friendship more than anything else. I wanna treasure my true friends till the end. This is why I have a Special People List. Lol.
Pitiful me, going blabity blabity blah about betrayal and loss of trust.. Sorry. I know some of you may be just like me, luck isn't with us when these things happen, but hey, you ain't the only one. Justice will be served one day. These people will receive retribution, and they'll pay. Don't worry. Have faith in youself. You might just have a happy ending.

Before you go, just wanna let you know that, whatever that lurks in my mind, it'll be written in the blog. Extremely personal okay? Cheers~